damn. how does music make you feel so fuckin alive?
Lately I’ve been fighting with myself. A part of me is trying to stir up a pot of unwanted shitty memories. It’s been 6 months. Day, night, day, night, day, night, day, night, and so forth. I feel so empty about it. I have so much to say and so much to feel, but I choose not to. I choose to make myself numb. These dreams feel real and the emotions throughout the day because of them feel extremely real. Waking up and being snapped back into reality I think is what hurts most. I’ve tried to put the pieces together myself, but I can’t. it really makes me crazy & makes me doubt myself. I think I need some closure so this stops. 6 months later and I still want to hear you say it. I still want to know why. maybe I need some closure, or maybe I should just sleep. happy birthday douche bag.